I’ve read every parenting book out there—or at least, it sure felt that way.
Yet still, I ended most days wondering if I was failing my kids. Then one afternoon, in a moment of defeat, I glanced at a simple farmhouse sign on my wall: Love never fails. That was the reminder I needed—because there really is one parenting strategy that never lets us down.
It’s not found in any parenting manual. It’s found in 1 Corinthians 13—and it doesn’t even mention parenting. That’s because this truth is meant for every part of life.
Trust me, this biblical guidance will never fail you—not just in parenting, but in every relationship that matters.
So what is this fail-proof strategy? It’s love.
But don’t mistake love for just being “nice.” Real love means doing what’s right for someone, even when it’s hard. It’s resilient. Relentless. And it never stops showing up.
1. Love is Patient.
If there is anything in this world that will test your patience, it’s parenting. From the beginning, when you’ve lost so much sleep, you don’t remember what day — maybe even what year it is — and your newborn is crying nonstop. To the toddler who throws a tantrum…again…in the middle of Walmart. To the teen who, after all you’ve done for them, disrespects you for the umpteenth time this week. Patience can be a challenge!
I remember when my teen would roll his eyes at me during dinner. Everything in me wanted to snap back—but I paused, took a deep breath, and chose patience. It changed the whole tone of the evening.
Patience isn’t just a virtue to be attained, it is a parenting strategy. When you’re patient, you make better decisions, speak right words, and avoid making mistakes you later have to apologize for.
But it doesn’t come naturally! Pray each day for patience in your parenting. It will transform your life and your relationship with your teen.
2. Love is Kind.
Do you speak kindly to your children?
Sometimes it’s easy to forget to check your tone as a parent, especially when you’re under a lot of stress or frustrated with your teen’s behavior. But make no mistake, your children are highly sensitive to the way you speak to them.
I’ll never forget the time I raised my voice in frustration, only to see my son’s face fall. That moment reminded me: kindness in my tone speaks louder than the words themselves.
It may seem irrational to you, but it deeply affects their sense of self-worth. When you speak kindly and, more importantly, respectfully to your children, you’re sending them a message that they are worth respecting. I know when I made this seemingly small adjustment, I saw HUGE changes in the responses I received from my teens.
That goes a long way in creating a home where children feel safe and valued.
3. Love is not rude.
Harsh words stick. Do you remember harsh or unkind words that were spoken to you as a child?
Most of us do.
It’s amazing how people in their 70s and 80s can recall with perfect accuracy rude words and dismissive attitudes directed at them when they were young children. It may seem like a moment in time to you, but those words go deep and cause long-term hurts.
That’s why it matters so much to model respectful speech—even when your teen is being rude. Colossians 4:6 reminds us, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt.”
4. Love Disciplines.
The trend of permissive parenting has led to a generation of people who do not respect authority, feel entitled, and are struggling to find success in life.
Proverbs 13:24 says, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them” (NIV).
It isn’t fun to discipline and correct your children, but if you want to be liked more than you want your child to turn out well, you’re not loving them. I know that can be tough to hear.
Discipline isn’t punishment—it’s training. Permissive parenting may feel easier in the moment, but in the long run it robs kids of respect and resilience. Proverbs 13:24 says real love corrects. Being firm when needed may not make you popular in the moment, but it will earn lasting respect.
5. Love Corrects.
Children and teens need correction all along the way. Don’t leave them to themselves.
It can be tempting to believe that we need to give teens more and more independence, and we do…when it comes to personal responsibility. But they are by no means done being discipled, coached, trained and corrected. Continue to point them in the right direction every day.
Correction that comes from a place of love should be constructive, not condemning.
Instead of shaming, correction should point children toward truth and wisdom. Be assured, when you train up a child in the way he should go, when he is older he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).
6. Love Keeps No Record of Wrongs
Teens mess up — a lot. But if every new conflict is met with a laundry list of past failures (“Well, remember when you lied last time…” or “You always do this…”), it chips away at their trust and confidence. Remember: Love deals with the issue at hand, not the running total.
When my son dented the car again, I was tempted to launch into a list of past failures. Instead, I chose to deal only with that day. His surprised look told me the message landed far better than my usual lecture.
Love separates what they did from who they are. Instead of “You’re always disrespectful,” try “That choice wasn’t respectful, and I know you’re capable of better.”
We all make mistakes and have opportunities to grow. Be sure your teen knows that you’re proud of who they’re becoming, even when they make mistakes.
7. Love Always Perseveres.
Parenting teens can feel like a constant test of endurance. But love keeps showing up—at the dinner table, the basketball game, the hard conversations. Even when they push you away, love leans in and says, “I’m not going anywhere.”
They might say things that frustrate or worry you. But persevering love keeps listening — not to agree, but to understand. Love keeps the door open, even when the words hurt. But it also holds them to a higher standard of conduct and requires respect.
8. Love Always Trusts, Always Hopes, Always Believes.
There may be a lot of uncertainties right now, but one thing is always sure: You can trust God’s plan for your teen’s life.
Even when you can’t see results, trust God’s plan for your child. Keep believing the seeds you’ve planted are taking root. Speak life into them: “I believe in you. I see the good in you. I’m not giving up.” That steady hope is often what carries them through.
Keep hoping, keep believing, keep praying. You can do this!
9. Love Never Fails.
There have been countless parenting strategies and ideas through the decades – some good, some not so good.
There is no one-size-fits-all parenting style, and there is no such thing as a perfect parent or a perfect child. There’s no way around it, it’s tough!
But if the Bible says that love never fails, then if you parent according to the Bible’s definition of love, you will not fail.
It doesn’t mean you won’t make mistakes—you will! And it’s okay. But it means you will have success as a parent and can rest knowing you’ve done it God’s way.
Love never fails.
Remember that the next time your teen is lashing out. Remember it the next time you are tempted to yell or criticize.
Embrace 1 Corinthians 13 as your guiding principle.
Love never fails!
